Funny how they say that fashion trends always come back around...and apparently, so do ex in-laws. Well...they didn't necessarily come around, but they were at the barn dance we went to last Saturday night. Strange really...cause I think the last time we went (some 8 to 10 yrs ago) they were there then. I know their son John has some connection to the P. Home Builders Association (I think he works...or used to work at Sante Fe Rental)...anyway, the last couple times that I saw them there, I felt it an uncomfortable situation and went up and said "hello". Mother Levar was always nice and talked to me, but father Levar would never even give me the time of day. So fast forward to Saturday night. We walked in during the cocktail hour...found a table and just as we were sitting down, Krystal and Rick walked in (we didn't even know that they were coming)...anyway, we were saving a spot for Jack and Jill (as we were sharing Taylor for babysitting services and Jill wasn't quite ready when we dropped Taylor off). Then RaeAnn and her dh...Ray & Jill...showed up as well...and it was nice to have a big crowd. And before I forget...what a "value" night out. The tickets were $20/ea. (which we got for free cause the company bought them)...and for that price you got drinks (beer, mixed, wine coolers, etc.)...as many as you could drink...a BBQ dinner that was to die for...a live country band (with dancing)...it was really fun...well, except for the ex in-law part, LOL.
So...after about 20 minutes...I told Nolan that I felt awkward and that maybe I should go over and say "hello". He looked at me and just said...NO, you've done enough! For 23 yrs you've bent over backwards for those people (even though you didn't have to)...let them come to you, period. So...I thought about it for a minute and decided he was right. Jimmy's 23 yrs. old...their son (my ex) gave up his parental rights when Jimmy was 7 (to allow Nolan to adopt him)...and they haven't seen Jimmy since he was about 9 or 10 (when my mom took him out for a visit one time). So...I enjoyed myself. All the while, though...they had walked past us several times (to the food line, etc.) and never said a word. It bothered me...I admit it. Why? Why does it matter after all these years?? Well...there's some things I know for "almost" a fact. One is that Mother Levar con't to send Jimmy xmas present and bday card every year...but I have the distinct feeling that she did it on the sly (unbeknownced to father Levar)...in fact, I really think that if FL hadn't been there, she probably would have talked to me. For some reason (I guess divorcing their son)...I'm on permanent "grudge" with FL. Granted, our last known conversation (just prior to my leaving Frank) was pretty heated and admittedly, I said some pretty harsh things. But hey...that was 23 years ago...I was just 21 yrs. old (just a kid myself). I have apologized verbally and written, but I guess it will never be enough. So...apparently getting a divorce is a far worse crime than giving up your biological son, hmmmm. Truly...it speaks volumes of the type of people they were/are...and undeniably...I made the right choice in leaving that family.
On a better note. John Levar (one of ex's older brothers) wasn't there early in the evening...but he walked in around 10 pm or so and came right over...gave me a hug and was just as sweet as could be. I also talked to his wife Donna and she was really nice as well (this was after ML and FL had already left). John was always super nice and I'm really glad I got to see him and speak to him.
Funny...just when you think you've left the past behind...there it is, at the Barn Dance! Jimmy and I talked about it the other night and basically, he said just "fuck 'em"...so yeah...what Jimmy said! LOL
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